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Interview with Frances Gong

Interview with Frances Gong

Written by Kathryn Tonges

Congratulations Frances you have successfully completed your first Parent Effectiveness Training course. Please tell us a little about yourself.

I am the mother of a 16 year old girl, my daughter and I came to Australia from China 4 years ago.  I like this country very much, and now I am trying to give more support to Chinese parents in Australia.

How did you first hear about P.E.T.? 

I bought a P.E.T textbook in China 7 years ago. I just read it and didn’t study it in depth. At that time, there were no friends who knew about this course.  3 years ago I had three friends who participated in the P.E.T workshop, which gave me the opportunity to learn.

What inspired you to become a P.E.T. instructor?

When I participated in the P.E.T. course for the first time, my instructor Sophie said that the best way to learn was to teach others. At that time, the problem of my daughter really troubled me, and I was eager to improve my skills. Sophie highly recommended for me to participate in P.E.T instructor workshop. I’m very grateful for her encouragement.

Tell us your experience of conducting your first P.E.T. course?

 I had been preparing for the first workshop for a long time, I have used all the skills of P.E.T proficiently in my daily life. My relationship with my child has been greatly improved and my daughter said that she was proud to have a mother like me. 

During the preparation period, I had been working on how to let the participants  have good experiences and how to let them use their skills in real life as soon as possible. In my opinion, my preparation was very effective.  I am really happy that P.E.T skills have helped them improve their relationship with their families.  In the next workshop, I want to design the activity to be more suitable for the current participants, so that they can understand and apply more easily.

How did you gather your first group of participants?

After the P.E.T instructor workshop, I have been sharing PET on my WeChat Moments, so many friends know what I am doing. most of the participants in my first workshop were my friends, and one was recommended by a friend.  

What were the significant areas of growth and change for your participants after completing the P.E.T. course?

 One of the participants who impressed me the most, she and her husband had not communicated with each other for a long time. During the workshop, she was invited to send a positive I-message to her husband. Her husband was very touched, they both expressed their appreciation and gratitude to each other.  Another participant gave active listening to the adult son, it helped her to be closer  to her son.  All participants made great progress in active listening.

What are your future plans as a P.E.T. Instructor?

 I plan to run my first online workshop in July.  So far, 3 P.E.T book clubs have been hosted.

Do you have any words of encouragement or advice for new instructors who are hesitating or are about to conduct their first course?

Enjoy being a sharer.

Thank you so much Frances for sharing your insights with other instructors. Your advice to enjoy being a sharer is really the key! ETIA wishes you all the very best for your future.

Kathryn Tonges

Kathryn Tonges

Online Australia & NZ, QLD

I have been deeply rewarded seeing positive transformations in families by teaching P.E.T. effective communication skills since 1978. My two sons are now parents, and I am witness to their natural use of P.E.T. skills in all their interactions with children and people. My passion is to share these skills with others through these options: 1. Parent Effectiveness Training - for parents, grandparents, carers. 2. Be Your Best – personal empowerment skills for self, relationships, and the workplace. 3. Teacher Effectiveness Training – increases the quality of interactions between student and teacher with more teaching-learning time. 4. Instructor Training - I am a Master Trainer of P.E.T., B.Y.B., T.E.T. and Y.E.T. for ETIA Ltd. In my teaching career I taught from early childhood to tertiary level focusing on Child Development and Communication Skills. I lived in Beijing for seven years and conducted P.E.T. and B.Y.B. courses for expatriates as well as training expatriates to become P.E.T. instructors. I have written for parenting magazines in Beijing and Australia and blog for my website The Parent Within ( Whilst in Beijing I co-authored a book with P.E.T. Instructors I had trained, to help expatriate children cope with the changes in their life. In the last couple of years I have taken on the position of President of ETIA Ltd. Children, parenting, and effective communications continues to be my passion as I share these courses both online (Australia and NZ) or face to face in Brisbane and the Sunshine Coast as well as coaching parents individually.

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Loving Family | About ETIA

About ETIA

The Effectiveness Training Institute of Australia (ETIA) Ltd is a not-for-profit, community based organisation that is dedicated to making courses in communication and conflict resolution skills available and accessible to all people in Australia.

ETIA’s mission is to provide individuals with effective communication and conflict resolution skills to build connected, harmonious relationships.

Our inspiration and programs come from the late Dr Thomas Gordon who is the author and founder of Parent Effectiveness Training (P.E.T.) program and Gordon Training International (GTI).

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